I dreamed of you early this morning

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      Down on the road I saw five men and among them a middle aged woman. She was unremarkable but for her youthful eyes. I couldn’t focus on her face fully as it blurs. She had jogging pants and a white t-shirt. I felt that I should know her. So I went to her and asked if she is Jordan Silver. And she said yes and then my nieces came by. While I focused on them, she went away. The men with her then sang a beautiful song that they wrote for her. Then the lead singer told me that Jordan has been sick in hospital all alone. And the song was for her. So I went home and found her there sitting in the kitchen. I told her that I am suicidal and I told God that as long as there Jordan is alive I will be. I told her how I raged when she disappeared for three months. I didn’t get to tell her how I grovel when she came back. Because my nieces were back and while I was organising food for them she left again when I turned to look back at her. But on the black board she left a message. I finished with breakfast and went to read the message she left, but Emilie was erasing it and most of the messages were gone. She left a series of clues in some books. But I couldn’t read them. Then I woke up. At nine. I am an insomniac. I went to sleep at 3.
      The thing with my dreams they are always true. So God is saying something I am afraid to understand. Because if I do…..

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