PMS and the writing schedule

My husband has many colorful terms for what the world calls PMS. Among them some of my favorites are, mad cow’s disease, and rabid dog syndrome. Yeah he thinks he’s funny.As a child I heard the older women in the family speak of Aunt Flo coming to visit. I have many aunts and not one of them are as demented as this bitch that shows up at my door once (and now that I’m pre-menopausal sometimes twice) a month. I’m not complaining, it could be worse. She could take up residence and decide to stay for an extended period pun intended. The heifer doesn’t bother me so much with her constant bid for attention as much as she does with her meddling ways. Every month like clockwork, whether I’m in the middle of a story or just getting started, she comes a calling with her shit. I always know when she’s coming up the driveway. The first clue is the way I look at my husband, the man of my heart, who in that moment is a pesky little bug that I want to terminate for breathing. He too senses her approach and gives me the beady eye. “That bitch about to show up?” That’s his classy way of putting such things. Over the years I have been told not to attempt to have any form of rational conversation since according to the Y chromosome, I lack all sense for the week leading up to-to about midway through the week after this blessed event. It’s a wonder the jackass is still breathing. But this is not about my own real life pain in the ass, it’s about the ones that run around inside my head like juiced up parrots on a binge. Long have I been telling them I have no interest in writing hot sticky love scenes while my body feels like it’s imploding on itself. DO they listen? Hell no. But I refuse to give in dammit. Men are the enemy for the next couple of days. The mere mention of one makes my eye twitch and my blood seethe. Mancini, that fuq, is an overbearing ass who is outdone only by Colton Lyon who seems to think he owns me and will not shut dafuq up. Bless their hearts…

Please follow and like us:

Leave a Reply